Mending the Misery
by DragonEye0905
Summary: AU; Two years ago, Sesshomaru left Rin. He told her that he didn't love her, that he never did. Rin was heartbroken, but now tries to move on. But that is very hard to do when the man you're trying to get over reappears and seems to be going out of his way to make you miserable.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I'm going to be realy straigh forward and admit something to you. When I wrote the majority of this chapter, I had no plot whatsoever. I didn't even have an idea. I just wanted to write an angsty romance between Rin and Sesshomaru. So I started to, and an idea came to me! :D How wonderful is that? I've got some details to put in the idea, but I felt set enough to pubish, and that's wha counts, right? **

**And I am probably the most idiodic person ever. This is my second attempt to do this story, because I took the first one down. Why? Because stupid me had uploaded a Legend of Zelda oneshot I had been working on instead of the actul story. I was really confused about the three reviews that were telling me I had it wrong, and then it hit me. Wow, I am sorry if anyone here read that thing. Gosh, me dumb.**

**Disclaimer****: I do not own Inuyasha. Nor will I ever. ;_;**

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"Sesshomaru! You can't leave me!" Rin cried out into the raining night at the retreating figure of Sesshomaru. The one man she'd ever be able to love.

"I'm afraid Rin, that this Sesshomaru has never been with you in the first place." Sesshomaru's cold voice responded to Rin's heart-felt cry. His back was turned to her, and he kept his head facing ahead, not even gracing her with his face.

"But I don't understand! What about all those times you said you loved me?" Rin stared hard at the back of her lover. How could he do this to her? He had to be toying with her…

"…they were all lies. I could never love a _human_." Rin felt more tears burning the backs of here eyes. She couldn't do this! She couldn't live without him…and the way he said 'human'…it was acid being poured into her ears, the venom he thrust into that one word.

"Goodbye, Rin." The demon started walking away, and in her desperation, Rin stared to scream his name. But all her attempts just bounced off the demon, as he made no show of even hearing her sorrow.

"…what did I do to ever deserve this?" Rin crashed to the mud-caked ground. Her sleeve muffled her sobs as she attempted to protect her face from the soaked ground. She could think of nothing that she could have done to cause this, or even to prevent it.

* * *

Rin sat on her back, staring into the star-filled sky. The deep-almost-black blue field was littered with the glowing dots that Rin loved so much. They reminded her of his eyes…

Slow tears started to flow down Rin's cheeks as she remembered what had happened those long two years ago. Today was the anniversary of the day Sesshomaru had left her. She had thought that he would change his mind, realize he had been crazy and come back to her. She would have forgiven him, but he never did show his face again.

After ten or so minutes, Rin was tired of feeling sorry for herself. Her pain was still great though, and it made her movements slow as she removed herself from the cool grass.

_He isn't coming back. So just stop thinking about him…_

Rin managed to drag herself onto the subway and find her way back to her apartment. As soon as the door clicked shut behind her, the tears she had kept at bay on the way home started to flow freely once more. She dropped her keys on her worn couch and made her way to her bathtub. She decided that a hot soak would be nice, and it might take her mind off the past.

But honestly? She doubted it.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thank you for viewing the second installment of 'Mending the Misery!' The masses are hungry, hungry for new words! Or maybe that's just me craving the pizza sitting on the computer desk. Oh well. *munches on dinner***

* * *

Rin gently leaned against the shoulder of the man sitting next to her on the park bench. A few months ago, Rin had decided to start dating again to help relieve her loss. Her first date had been a success, save for the bit of tears that had come up at the beginning.

It was nice to have this man in her life. He was sweet, charming, and understood that she wanted to wait for marriage before doing anything too sensual.

Yes, Rin was really liked Kohaku. It helped that he was really cute too, in that helpless, innocent way even though he was actually quite strong both physically and mentally. Not that looks were what she was looking for in a man…

"So, Rin. Want to go do something? I'd even go shopping if you'd like." Kohaku gave Rin that crooked smile he was so infamous for. He knew it killed her, as she thought he was so adorable already, but that smile really pushed him over the edge on cuteness.

"I know you only 'want' to go shopping because you're hoping that I'll buy you food." Rin sarcastically replied, but she was smiling.

"You know me too well." Kohaku laughed. There it was, that amazing smile again. Melting was something that Rin couldn't help doing whenever she saw it. And right now, she felt like a puddle of melted milk chocolate.

Rin managed to drag Kohaku around into six different clothing stores, but she didn't buy but one thing. She just wanted to torment him. And in retaliation, Kohaku ordered the largest, most expensive meal on the menu at the burger joint they went to afterward.

* * *

That evening, Kohaku and Rin were standing outside of a small ice cream parlor called, 'Cold Cream.' It was the halfway point between their homes, and was where they said goodbye every time they parted ways.

It was an inside joke between then because one of their first dates had been at that parlor, and Kohaku had forgotten to walk her home. Rin didn't mind so much, but Kohaku must have apologized a million times over the phone that evening, and then the next time they had met up.

"I guess I'll see you Saturday? If we're still up for that movie." Kohaku was holding Rin's hand, and it was cold from the winter wind as he refused to wear gloves because he said 'they're just one more thing in the way of me being close to you.' Rin laughed at the idea.

"Well, so long as I don't get fatally injured or something and land in the hospitol, I haven't made any other plans."

"Wait, yeah, I'll be having my blood replaced that day, I totally forgot." Lightly, Rin thumped Kohaku over the head for his joke. He just laughed and took it. After a hit or two, Kohaku leaned down to plant a kiss on Rin's nose. He then brought her closer for a hug and then turned to leave.

Rin waved at him as he walked away, and as if he somehow knew, Kohaku turned around and blew her a kiss. Rin 'caught' it and held her enclosed hands to her chest. Kohaku tried to hide his laugh but failed.

Sighing a sigh of contentment, Rin turned to go her own way. She was thinking over the events of the day, and almost didn't notice the figure standing in front of her apartment.

Almost.

Gasping, Rin dropped her bag and scurried to hide behind the street light to her left.

_How could he…when did he…_

Rin couldn't form coherent thoughts. Her mind was not strong enough to wrap around anything at the moment. All she knew is that the man standing forty feet away was possibly the scariest man she could ever run into right now.

"Sesshomaru…" she whispered his name.

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**A/N: Don't forget to click on the nice box down there (the one where words go) and write me a nice review! Or flame me! Whateva' floats your boat! Although I would prefer helpful criticism or just fluff over a flame. :D  
**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Here it is! The 3rd chapter! :D I'm hoping you guys enjoy it! And I'm also hoping that you don't find it too much like the second one. I think it seems like filler, but I really think it's a good one nonetheless!**

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"Sesshomaru…" Rin whispered the name of the man who was staring up at her apartment building.

As if hearing his name, Sesshomaru turned in the direction on where Rin was trying to hide. Rin knew her attempt at being unseen was hopeless, and she could feel sweat trickling down her brow. Golden eyes locked with brown ones, and Rin was frozen in what felt like fear.

His sharp features stood out, making him seem menacing and dangerous. His clothes were dark, and looked very expensive, adding to the effect. His red and blue markings, along with his silver hair, marked him for what he really was. Demons lived amongst the humans, though most preferred to conceal their oddities due to the attitude many humans felt toward the other race.

But Sesshomaru was different. He didn't care what the humans thought, in fact, he wanted them to know full well who and what exactly they were dealing with. Rin thought that he enjoyed striking fear into people's hearts.

When she saw that Sesshomaru was walking towards her, Rin broke from her daze and ran in the other direction. She thought she heard loud, quick footsteps pounding away behind her, but after a few blocks, she realized that if she were being chased, she would have been caught by now.

Panting, Rin wondered if what she saw had been all an illusion. She couldn't lie to herself; she had seen false images of him before. But none of those times had felt so real, not like today.

Regaining her composure, Rin decided it would be wise to not go straight back, in fear of Sesshomaru still being there. But she was also curious, and her curiosity always won over her sense of reasoning.

When she returned to her street, she peeked around the corner she was behind to see if he was still there. Thankfully, Sesshomaru really had been an illusion, or had decided to leave. Rin wasn't sure which one made her more upset. While she wasn't too keen on having the man who left her hanging around, she really didn't want to be considered crazy.

Rin practically ran the rest of the way to her room. Locking the door behind her, Rin flopped down on the couch. She let out a sigh, and thought about all the reasons Sesshomaru could have returned.

In the end, she couldn't think of anything other than he had come for her…the thought sent goosebumps trailing down her arms. Although it seemed a likely possibility, she continued to wonder why? After all this time that he could have come back, he chose now? And when she was thinking that she really liked Kohaku at that.

Not knowing what to do, or even sure of the reason Sessomaru had returned, Rin sulked away and crawled under her covers after a hot bath.

Hopefully everything would be normal tomorrow, and that she was just crazy.

* * *

"You seem troubled, what's up?" Kohaku nudged Rin's hip with his own as the pair was walking away from the theater. Rin had still been thinking about her Sesshomaru sightings. Since Tuesday, the first time she saw him; Rin had seen Sesshomaru three other times. All of them had been the same as the first though. She had seen him for a second, had turned around, and he had been gone when she turned again.

"I was paying attention!" Mildly startled by outside voices, Rin's words came out sounding irritated, although that wasn't the case.

"I never said you weren't." Kohaku stared at Rin for a while, and she squirmed under his gaze. She knew she had been caught. After an awkward silence between the two, Kohaku spoke again. "You were fidgeting during almost the entire movie. I just wanted to know what was going through that big head of yours."

"My head," Rin scoffed, "is not that big. It is the perfect size of cute and lovable."

"Yes, but I happen to think that your head being big _is_ what makes it cute and lovable." Kohaku teased. He got a playful fist to the arm for that.

The two walked back in silence. At some point, Rin and taken Kohaku's hand in her own and held onto it for all that counted. She needed to be reassured that someone in her life was real.

They parted ways at the usual spot, and more kisses were blown in retreat, like the last time they had separated.

Tonight, Rin got into her apartment just fine; there had been no signs of her former lover. Her bedroom felt very cold though, and she noticed that the window was wide open.

_Funny…I don't remember leaving this open…_

Hurriedly, Rin walked over to the window and shut it tight. She must be losing her mind, now she couldn't even remember to shut her windows.

As Rin was passing her bed to change into her sleepwear, her fears of the past few days had been confirmed.

As she was removing from her covers a long, very shiny silver hair, she knew for certain that it wasn't her imagination. Sesshomaru really was here, and he had been in her apartment. That last thought really scared her.

_Sesshomaru…in my apartment…how did he even know where I lived?!_

Something was definitely going to happen, and Rin hoped beyond all hope that her life wasn't in too much danger. She knew that she wouldn't be able to face anything comparing to what she had gone through those two years ago. She didn't know if her heart could take another blow so forceful.

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**A/N: If this seems to be going all too fast, then I would appreciate a quick say-so so that I can make any changes necessary to the future parts that I have written out! **


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: some Sesshomaru interaction time! X3 The moment you've all been waiting for, the Stalker meets his Stalked! :D Yay! Clap! Clap for the beautiful *coughcreepyasallgetoutcough* couple! XD**

* * *

Rin was very on edge for the next few days. Every corner she turned, she expected to see a tall figure with a head full of silver hair. The hair that she found on her bed still made her uneasy to think of. If only she knew how he had gotten in there…

No, then she would want to know _what_ he was doing in her apartment. Rin would not be satisfied until this puzzle was complete.

…_I feel like some wannabe detective…but I need to know what's going to happen._

What may have been worst of it all was that Rin couldn't bring herself to tell Kohaku any of this. Whenever she thought about telling him some tiny detail, she felt uneasy.

Rin was too deep in though to notice the man standing in her path. Her head was down, and he seemed to appear from nowhere really.

"Oh, gosh! I'm so sorry!" Rin had bumped headfirst into the man's chest. Embarrassed at how she hadn't been looking, Rin knelt down to gather up the things she had dropped in the collision.

"Again, I'm really sorry." her head still looking around the ground for any missing belongings, Rin started to introduce herself. "My name is-"

"Rin."

Rin froze at the sound of his voice. Not just anyone's voice though, it was _his._ Slowly, she turned her head to only be caught in an endless gaze with golden eyes that pierced their way into her soul.

Seeming to regain movement, Rin scrambled up and back wards, trying to get away from Sesshomaru.

"Wha….wha…" although she could once again move, her voice betrayed her and got caught in her throat. Her palms started to become covered in a layer of sweat, and she wrung the hem of her shirt as she struggled to overcome her nervousness.

"Rin." He just repeated her name. His silky voice dripping with an unspoken power behind it. The deep melodic sound filling Rin's ears was blissful while at the same time frightening.

Stepping closer, Sesshomaru's eyes darkened, and his entire form became more menacing than Rin thought possible. One thought resounded through her head over and over again.

_Run._

She was all too willing to comply to that voice, and she sprinted past Sesshomaru's shoulder. She knew he had expected her to run the other direction, as he lunged at the spot where she had been instead of going for the area next to him.

Rin ran straight ahead for five blocks before braving turning around a corner. That was a mistake though, as she once again collided headfirst into her tall pursuer. Falling onto her back, Rin stared with wide, fear-filled eyes into Sesshomaru's face.

He stared back at her, and the silence between them was thick with tension. Unable to stand it any more, Rin found that words were once again coming to her.

"What do you want? And what do I have to do with it?"

"Rin…" once again, he only spoke her name, only thing time there was a silent threat behind it. What it was, Rin was too shaken to figure it out.

Sesshomaru reached for Rin's face, and while she tried to pull away, Sesshomaru was too strong for her to resist. He cupped her face in his hands, and leaned in close to her. Rin's eyes were squeezed shut as tight as she could possibly get them. She felt his breath, hot and smelling of vanilla, on her face.

Sesshomaru managed to pull her up off of the ground, and she held her close to his body. He was warm, almost hot. Rin's skin prickled with the knowledge that he was closer to her than he had ever been before.

Desperately wanting this nightmare to end, Rin was very confused and angry with herself when she heard a tiny voice in the back of her head. It was telling her just how wonderful it would be if Sesshomaru were to close that gap between their lips and-

_NO!_ Rin didn't want that. She couldn't want that! Could she? In desperation, Rin tried to pull back from Sesshomaru's grasp. She had to prove to herself that _she_ was in control of her own feelings.

Though he would not let up so easily. Rin struggled against his hold on her, and after she was ready to just give in and lean into her past lover's hold, she was shoved away from the warm embrace. The sudden change in Sessmoaru's actions startled Rin, and she almost fell over onto the pavement when she was shoved back. Luckily though, she managed to stay upright long enough to catch her balance.

Rin felt crushed. She didn't know what, but there was a huge weight on her soul, and she couldn't seem to break free of its grasp on her. It grew heavier the longer she stared into Sesshomaru's cold eyes, and she almost couldn't stand the pressure any longer. Finally, she repeated her question from earlier, hoping that this time, she would receive a proper response.

"What do you want, Sesshomaru?" Just saying his name made her heart ache, and she knew that he could see it in her eyes that she was hurting inside.

Almost as expected, silence met her words. Not in the immature, me-silence-is-my-answer way, but as if Sesshomaru was telling her that she was beneath his time and effort.

Rin stared the demon down until he finally did speak in his icy voice, "What I chose to do with my life is of no concern to you."

Rin couldn't believe what she was hearing. He must have _some_ nerve if he was going to speak to her like that!

"Well, when you go around stalking me for the past week and then approach me like you just did, I think it does concern me!" Rin yelled at the silver-haired man standing in front of her, and she felt weak when she saw that he was unfazed by what she had said.

Rin hadn't noticed it, but while she had been in contact with Sesshomaru, the sky had darkened, and thunder now boomed overhead. Rin was startled out of the gaze she hadn't know she had been locked in, and she looked up into the sky. A fat drop smacked her forehead and she looked back down to see that she was once again alone.

It seemed that if she wanted answers, she would have to corner the demon. But the question was, did she really want them that badly? Was she willing to risk the safety of her heart again? She wasn't sure, and she wished that things hadn't changed. Not now, not back then either.


	5. Chapter 5

**Gah...to save time and space, lets just say that this chapter got on my nerves and that it should have been here sooner, but wasn't. Yeah, sorry about the wait. I know that I usually am quick about the updates on this one, but things have been slow for me. **

**Anyway, here is a chapter in Sesshomaru's perspective. I know I had someone wanting this, and I hope that others did too! I also hope that it's worth the wait I put you through! Even if it is kind of short...**

* * *

Sesshomaru slammed his fist into the wall beside him. The cement crumbled from the brute force. Sesshomaru was angry, and in his mind, he had good reason to be.

Rin…how could she?! She had rejected him! _Him! _Sesshmoaru, demon lord of the west, the man of Rin's dreams, the only reason she was still able to _breathe! _How then, had she resisted him? He had offered her everything she could desire. What had made her turn from him?

Sesshomaru was the perfect being. Charming in a menacing way, handsome beyond all belief, with an icy glance that would make any woman melt. Woman have crawled to his feet and worshiped him. Rin would have too, at one point. But what had made her change her ways?

Sesshomaru walked over to the beaten up couch that sat in the middle of the room. For his temporary living space, Sesshomaru had chosen a mostly-unused warehouse. It was not in his preferences, but he needed a place that Rin would never find. And right now, it would be a little suspicious if he had chosen some elaborate apartment.

Sesshomaru sat down on the worn sofa, and leaned back so that he was fully stretched out. One of his arms was flung over his head, the other hanging off the couch. Sesshmoaru closed his eyes, determined to push Rin's face from his mind. He was rather good at meditating and pushing all things from his thoughts to clear his mind, but today, the image of Rin's smiling face, her laughter ringing in his ears, it would not remove itself from Sesshomaru's conscious.

Growling, Sesshomaru bolted upright into a sitting position. His silver hair flew in every direction in the movement, and landed so that it was spilling down his back and over his shoulders. His mind would not calm. Rin's picture was too clear in his mind for rest. He needed a way to relieve himself from her taunting image.

Sesshomaru was a calm, cool, collected man on the outside. But his inner nature loved the hunt, and the sight of blood that he had spilled. It was his demonic nature to crave such things as death by his hand. Some time ago, he had pushed down his true nature for Rin, because he had thought that he had loved her. Now he was all too willing to give in whenever the beast started to call.

Looking down at himself, Sesshomaru decided that going out in this neighborhood in some on the most expensive of clothes would not be in his best interest. He was already upset enough that he had to change from his traditional kimono and armor, but now changing down into common humans clothes would be almost humiliating.

Although…

It would be easier to blend in with the people if he were not wearing clothes that picked him out. Human eyes were attracted to expensive things. And when they saw his clothes, the next thing the saw was always him silver hair, a feature of demons. Sesshomaru admired the way people shot him dirty or fear-filled glances. He was above them, and they all knew it.

But his goal would be much easier if he had something less conspicuous to hide himself in.

Digging through the various cabinets and boxes strewn throughout the warehouse, Sesshomaru managed to find clothes that would fit his need, and his body.

Sesshomaru sneered at the faded, dark gray sweatshirt and dark jeans that he found. He was not pleased with the attire. He changed into them nonetheless. Another reason he complied was that he was sure that Rin would find him less of a monster if he wore them…

Monster? Had he really just referred to himself as such a creature? Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed. He was no such thing…a demon he was, but a monster was a filth name for his kind. The lower class demons were monsters, but not one such as him.

Sesshomaru opened the door leading out into the sun filled world. He could smell the faint scent of lilies and honey.

_Rin must have been nearby…_

A slow smirk made its way onto Sesshomaru's lips. Finding Rin would not take so much effort it seemed…not when she passed by his hiding place. He stepped out into the crisp air and followed Rin's scent trail. He would see where she had gone when she was last near. Sesshomaru could tell that this would turn out in his favor. Rin would never find him, but from the scent, Sesshomaru could tell that Rin passed through this area often. It seemed that Sesshomaru had picked the perfect place to hide after all...


	6. Chapter 6

_The rain beat down on the roof of the gazebo, and Rin looked out into the storm to see if anyone was out there. The darkness mixed with the hazy rain made things very difficult to navigate through._

_Footsteps echoed through the night, and Rin looked out from her shelter once more to see if someone was really out there. _

_Nothing. There was no sight of any life out there, and she didn't blame people for not wanting to be out in this weather._

_Rin turned away from the entrance of the little hut and stared at the lantern that hung from the opposite side. It light wasn't much, but it was enough to see by._

_Feeling something press down on her shoulder, Rin turned to face that direction once again. What she saw caused her to gasp and flash her hands up to cover her mouth._

_A tall man with long silver hair stood in front of her. His shirtless frame was sopping wet, and his hair sparkled in the low light as water ran down the silver strands._

_His eyes were otherworldly, and shone a magnificent golden color. Though they were cold, and uncaring. He had a blue crescent moon on his forehead and two red slash marks running from his cheeks back into his hair, the ends hidden from view. She could see that his ears were elongated and pointed at the tips._

_It was obvious to Rin that this man was a demon. It would have been obvious to anyone, but most people would be dumb enough to ask for confirmation. Instead, she only backed away from him as he stepped further into the sheltered area._

_Rin wondered why he was out in the rain…she wondered why _she _was out in the rain. She couldn't remember why or how she had come into this situation, but she was stuck nonetheless._

_His golden eyes narrowed as his studied her body. She knew he wasn't really looking at her in a suggestive way; he looked like the kind of demon that would never step into anything of the sort with a human. But still…the way his eyes went over her felt very intimate. She felt exposed to him in every possible way.  
_

_Looking up into his eyes, Rin regretted it almost instantaneously. He returned her gaze, and the exposed feeling increased. Only now it seemed it was her soul he was digging into._

_Rin let out a small noise of surprise as she felt the wall of the shelter ram into her back. She had not realized that she had been continuously stepping back; nor had she realized that this man had been coming closer to her. Looking up at him, she wondered what he meant to do now that he had her cornered, if anything at all. With his cold gaze, he looked like he wouldn't mind killing her right there._

_Somehow though, Rin found a burst of courage within herself to open her mouth and say something. It was simple, but more than she ever would have thought she would say._

"_I'm Rin." Her voice was weak, and trembled slightly. The demon stared at her with his hard eyes, saying nothing for what seemed like ages. Finally, his lips parted the least possible amount for him to only respond with,_

"_Sesshomaru." Slightly confused at first, Rin had no clue as to what he meant. Then she remembered that the demons and the humans almost never shared names. To the humans, demon names were strange and complicated. Rin swallowed the lump in her throat and started to speak again, but she was cut off by Sesshomaru's clipped tone._

"_I do not desire to listen to anything else you have to say." Rin felt heartbroken. She found it unusual, as she didn't know this man and didn't know if she wanted to. But she was normally a very caring person. She knew no strangers. And to have her nature beat down by someone so cold and uncaring…it made her want to do the opposite of what he said. _

"_I was only curious as to why you'd be out stuck in the rain in a small park gazebo." Rin's squeezed her lips together, something she did when she knew she was playing with fire._

_Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed at her, and his voice was deep and thick as he growled out, "I could ask you the same thing." Rin swallowed again. Why was she out here again? She couldn't remember. Even though she had no reason, she didn't know that._

"_I…I don't know why I'm out here exactly." Figuring that if she told the demon why she was out here, he might tell her hers. What cold go wrong?_

_Sesshomaru leaned dangerously close to Rin's face, and her breath caught in her throat. She could feel his hot breath on hers, causing her own breathing to pick up. His voice when he spoke almost sounded like a purr, causing Rin's heart to slam against her chest._

"_Why is the girl out at night all alone? Doesn't she know of the big bad demons who might try to steal her away?" Rin looked once more into Sesshomaru's golden eyes, but she could not keep his gaze, so she looked anywhere but at him._

_She honestly did not think he would 'steal her away.' He didn't look as if he wanted to waste his time doing such a thing. She was so nervous because he was just so _handsome, _and therefore__ didn't know if the thought of him stealing her away would be that much of a bad thing. Even if she didn't like his personality so far._

_Shaking the thought from her head, Rin accidentally bumped her forehead into the demon's sharp nose. He grunted and pulled away from Rin's face, and she was about to apologize for bumping into his when he grabbed her arm in a tight hold and just started at her with the most vicious look she had ever seen. It made her want to curl up and sink into the floor, never to be seen again. But the knowledge that it was coming about from his nose being bumped made her want to prove to him that she wasn't going to back down. _

_After a while of the two of them just standing there, one bruising the other, Sesshomaru took his other hand and brushed a stray lock of hair that had fallen in from on Rin's eyes away and tucked them behind her ear. Confused, Rin opened her mouth to question why this strange demon was touching her hair, when he silkily answered her unspoken thoughts._

"_Your eyes are brown, like dark mud. Such an interesting color…" Rin would have taken this comment as an insult from anyone else under any other conditions. But the fact that this demon had said it, one that had seemed so cold…Rin didn't exactly know how to feel. Or what his words meant._

_Perhaps his words meant nothing; maybe he was only stating the obvious. But he didn't seem the type that would say anything that was obvious. She just needed to-_

Rin woke up to the sound of an alarm clock blaring in her ear. The repetitive loud beeping shaking all remains of the dream from her body. But…

She had dreamt about it again. The first time she had met Sesshomaru…it had been at least thirteen months since she last recalled that raining night. What had compelled her to think about while asleep?

Biting her lip, Rin got ready for her day. She didn't want to think about what it meant, but she felt as if she had to. She just didn't know if she would like her conclusion if she thought about it too much, too deeply.

What about that night had even made her feel attracted to him? Was it the danger he had held? Rin wasn't normally one for danger, she preferred what she knew was safe. And it wasn't his looks, because while he was handsome beyond all belief-even for a demon-she never really put much thought on appearance. Even thought she didn't want to admit it, the reason she had fallen for him enough to find him again was the strange comment he had made on her eyes.

The way he said it, like it meant nothing to say it, even though it had because he had said anything at all…it made Rin want to know more about the man under that silver hair and golden eyes. And thinking about it now, Rin wished he had never said anything at all…

* * *

**A/N: Rin and Sesshomaru's first moments together! X3 I hope you were brave enough to get to this part, as I may have been a little confusing. I don't know, I'm the author, it all comes together for me as I know what I'm doing. **

**I have received from my blessed readers some statements of confusion regarding why Sesshomaru left only to come back to Rin two years later, trying to win her over.  
I can explain my reasoning for that to you if you wish. To save room in my author notes and your time, I won't go into detail in this chapter. If enough of you wish, than I may post in an upcoming chapter. Or you can just PM me if you wish to know. Though if you PM me...I can't promise you getting out without getting a spoiler or me begging for some form of help. I'm a starving author who does this for fun and for your enjoyment. Anyone who does this willingly needs some kind of help. **


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Okay...here is this really long chapter. And it's going to be even longer because I owe you an explanation in the later author notes.  
And I'm really sorry about the super long wait. It's been hard to write ANYTHING lately, and I wanted to get this done right. I want to put out my best, not just the first thing I write down. So I hope that you'll forgive my slowness, and that you like what I've done. Now lets hope that this time-gap doesn't happen again!**

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Five weeks of torture. Five weeks of tying to avoid Sesshomaru, and most often failing.

Rin sat cross-legged in her large circular chair, holding her book above her head to read. She had some quirks, but she was proud about them when people took notice to them. Her book would have been rather interesting if she could have focused her mind on it rather than Sesshomaru. He had shown up to her workplace. She worked at a small library, doing ordinary library jobs along with the two other people she worked with.

She liked her job; she liked how it was a smaller building where she could see if the patrons needed help finding something from the counter. But she hadn't enjoyed yesterday afternoon, when she saw Sesshomaru walk in.

Rin had never known him to wear anything that didn't look like it would cost a bagillion dollars, but he had been dressed in simple jeans and a sweatshirt. He had seemed like an illusion then, and even now she wondered if he had shown up at all.

But the way her co-workers both had reacted to him by pointing and whispering had proved it. He just…didn't seem real yesterday. Like he had only been half alive. Maybe he was dying.

_Wouldn't that be a relief for me…_

Sighing, Rin closed her book and settled deep into her chair. She stared at her kitchen wall, wishing she could have a bigger apartment, where standing in the living room didn't require one to practically be leaning into the kitchen.

But that thinking process was only an attempt to distract herself.

_Which I think it's…no, it's not working._

A glare made its way onto Rin's smooth features. It wasn't directed at anything in particular, but she was annoyed with how much control Sesshomaru was taking over in her life. He was constantly on her mind; anything at all could bring him to her thoughts.

Rin looked to her clock and jumped from her seat. She was going to be late…

* * *

Rin dashed into the small building where her weekly painting classes took place. She was maybe five minutes late, so she didn't worry too much, as the instructor was always at least ten minutes behind.

Rin flew into the room where the class met and almost fell over as she hastily sat down on the stool next to her friend.

"Sango…" Rin panted. "Has Jakotsu come in yet?"

Sango smiled at her friend and said in a soft voice, "No, he's still in the office. I heard other voices, so I think he's meeting with someone."

Rin stared at the table she was seated at. There was an arrangement of different styles of brushes, pencils and sponges. Nothing was making any sense to her at that moment. She couldn't remember what all of these different brushes were used for.

Just as she was collecting her jumbled thoughts, her art instructor, Jakotsu, walked out of his cramped and cluttered office wearing a content smile on his face. Rin never liked it when he looked like that. It usually meant that he had something crazy planned out for everyone.

"Today, my lovelies," Jakotsu started with a clap of his hands, "I have gathered a group of volunteers for whom you will be painting over the course of the next week or so. I want you to remember now, that some of them were less... _complying_ then others."

Rin didn't know what to think of that last statement. Less than willing…what had Jakotsu possibly done to make…

_On second thought…I'd rather not think about it._

Men and women started to pour out of the small office behind Jakotsu. Rin could tell which of them were not happy to be here by the expressions on their faces. All of them just took the seat closest to them where an artist could look at their faces. Rin, being at the back of the class, wondered just what kind of person she would get to…

Dear Lord no…

The last person to shuffle out of the office was none other than Rin's personal tormentor. He was wearing a white, green and blue striped button-down shirt that showed off his muscular frame. His silver hair spilled down his back, and it seemed extra shiny this morning, even in the dim lighting of the art studio.

His golden eyes locked in with Rin's and she could feel a drop of sweat dripping down her forehead. No doubt he could see it…

"Rin…" she heard Sango whisper in her ear, "your model is so handsome. You're quite the lucky one."

"Yeah…lucky." Rin was a little surprised at Sango's words. All except her little brother, her family had been murdered by demons, and she now thought of the entire race as cold-blooded monsters.

Sesshomaru sat down on the stool behind Rin and looked at her with his black expression. He was the only demon of all the volunteer models, and definitely the most gorgeous. He leaned against the counter at which he and Rin were seated at, and he almost looked bored. Rin knew that to not be true. He was here at all, and the Sesshomaru she knew didn't do anything that wouldn't satisfy him.

Rin took up the pencil she would use to draw the layout. Her hands shook as she moved the pencil to the blank canvas that was set up between her and Sesshomaru. The demon continued to stare at her, and she was afraid that she wouldn't be able to do anything in fear of messing up.

Sesshomaru didn't seem the type to forgive if his face was made to look below its radiance as it appeared in life. She was afraid that she wouldn't be able to do him justice, and that he would become angry with her, and an angry Sesshomaru would do anything to get revenge.

Taking in a deep breath, Rin started to draw Sesshomaru in how he was seated before her. She paid special attention to the wrinkles and folds of his clothes, and she lightly sketched the line pattern of his shirt.

His eyes were the hardest things to draw; as every time she looked there, she was pulled into an intense stare-down that Sesshomaru wouldn't let her out of. His hair was also difficult, as she wanted to bring out the shines with her pencil, but she knew that it would be useless when she pained over it. But it just looked so silky, so glossy…

When the alarm for the end of the class sounded, Rin jumped from surprise. She hadn't realized it, but she had wasted her last ten minutes just staring at Sesshomaru. And from the hint of a smug look that he was giving her…she had obviously been looking at him in a dreamy way. She couldn't remember what she had been thinking, but it had changed her face enough to pull something from Sesshomaru's expression.

Scurrying up, Rin moved all of her supplies back to the various containers they belonged in. It wasn't something she normally did, as she would just need to get them back out the next week, but she could feel Sesshomaru's eyes on her and she knew that as soon as she stepped outside he would pounce on her and trap her again.

Rin walked to the stairs that would take her to the ground floor of the studio, watching Sesshomaru using her peripheral vision. He seemed to be conversing with one Jakotsu, but Rin knew that he was watching her as well.

When Rin reached the crisp outdoor air, she almost started to sprint in the direction of her apartment. She really didn't want Sesshomaru to catch her. While it was obvious that he was much faster than her, Jakotsu had a way of trapping people in strange conversations and Rin was hoping that he would keep the demon busy until Rin was safe.

Unfortunately for Rin, she was not so lucky with her time. Slamming headfirst into a muscled torso, Rin stumbled backwards onto the ground.

Sesshomaru looked down at her with a vicious glare, and he moved down to drag her back onto her feet. His silky voice held an array of different emotions (anger being the most outstanding) as he growled in Rin's ear.

"Why are you running from our inevitable reunion?" Rin could feel hot tears streaming down her face as she looked into the piercing eyes of the demon holding her up. She didn't want to cry, not like this. Not in front of him…but he scared her, he had caused her so much pain already, and Rin was afraid not only for her heart this time but her life.

She couldn't form any words; she couldn't push anything out over her sobs. Sesshomaru stared at her while he waited for her to answer him, which only made things worse for Rin. If only he would look away…

But that wasn't Sesshomaru. He took what he wanted, when he wanted, how he wanted. Why had Rin ever fallen for this man? He was cruel, unkind, unmerciful…everything that Rin wasn't. But she also remembered a time when he had been _less_ hateful. When he had cared, even though he didn't necessarily show it.

Rin had to be strong…she had to be strong for the Sesshomaru she used to know. Blinking the remnants of her tears away, Rin met Sesshomaru's fierce gaze with her own that was just as strong. Sesshomaru looked a little taken aback at how determined she looked.

"You want to know why I'm running from you?" She urged. Although she knew that Sesshomaru wouldn't respond, she paused a moment before continuing.

"I'm running from you because that's exactly what you did to me two years ago. You ran away, for I-don't-know-why. You left me crushed and alone. Then you return, and you expect me to just fall willingly back into your arms like nothing ever happened?" Rin's voice was raised to the point of almost screaming as she continued her speech.

And with every word that she had said, Sesshomaru's eyes had grown just a smidgen wider. He hadn't expected that Rin would be anything but timid and helpless as she tried to avoid him. This was unexpected, and…and he liked the challenge.

A small smirk rose at the corner of Sesshomaru's lips, and he spoke in a smooth, rich voice in response to what Rin had said.

"Do you really wish to know why this Sesshomaru returned after so long?" His eyes were narrowed in a alluring way, and it made a small lump form in Rin's throat to see his handsome face make an expression that wasn't anger.

As she couldn't speak around the lump, Rin nodded her head in answer. A small chuckle bubbled up in Sesshomaru's throat and he tilted his head down as he continued to laugh for a moment.

When he returned his gaze to Rin, his eyes were hard and serious. He moved so that his lips were brushing against Rin's ear, and she felt shivers travel down her spine from the sensation.

"If you really want to know…" he paused and he let out a breath against her ear, sending more shivers crawling down her back, "…then you'll have to come with me." Rin pulled back as far as Sesshomaru's hold would allow her. She stared in horror at the demon. Could she really just leave everything to follow Sesshomaru? Because she knew him, he wasn't implying that she just go with him to wherever he wanted to take her for a while, but he meant leave everything behind and follow along blindly.

She didn't think she could do it. In truth, if she looked deep into her core, she was sure that she still loved Sesshomaru. But…what if he decided that he didn't want her again? She couldn't deal with that. At least last time she had had some foundation to fall back on. Not this time, not if she were to go with him…

The answer was simple. She couldn't do it. But then…why did she feel like she would be making a mistake?

"I…" Rin looked into the golden eyes that were staring back at her, waiting for her to say 'yes.' She didn't want to disappoint them, but she had been disappointed herself, and that made things much easier to say.

"I can't. I won't." Rin stated with fierce certainty. Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed with anger this time as he snarled back,

"Are you sure?"

Rin nodded her head once in answer. Disgusted, Sesshomaru threw Rin down to the ground, not caring what happened to her at that point. He turned on his heel and stalked off in the direction from which he had come from. Rin watching him leave, and noted at how tense he seemed. She knew that she had made him angry by her rejection at his offer, but she just couldn't have done it. Not with the way he had treated her.

_I hope that this means that he'll leave me alone now…_

* * *

**A/N: Well, now that we have _that_ out of the way...I can get onto my explanation as to why Sesshomaru left Rin only to come back for her.**

**Sesshomaru decided that Rin was beginning to bore him, or get in his way. Anyway, he didn't want her around. So he left. Simple enough.**

**As to why he came back for her...it may be a little confusing. He came back because I've (or am trying) to make Sesshomaru out to be sadistic and selfish. And he decided that he wants to see Rin in pain. So, knowing that seeing him again would cause her suffering, Sesshomaru returned and started to pursue her.  
My goal for this story is to subtly change Sesshomaru so that he truly desires to be with Rin instead of just hurting her. So far, I'm pretty much just making him angry, but he needs to get over himself before he can love someone else. So, long story short,**

**Sesshomaru is a butt,**

**He's a sadistic butt,**

**And he wants to hurt Rin.**

**Hope that cleared it up for you! :D Feel free to PM me if you have any further questions.**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Forewarning, this chapter is a little...ungh, I don't know. Odd, maybe? Kind of fast paced. It just felt weird to me, I'm hoping you wonderful people like it. It's really more of a bridge chapter, getting the story to the point that I want it to be to develop more plot (Plot? What plot?). Thank you all so much for your continued reading and regular reviews! (for those of you that review)**

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Rin sat on the park bench next to Kohaku. No words were exchanged; Kohaku had given up trying to induce conversation long ago. Rin was deep in thought. She hadn't seen Sesshomaru in over a month, and she was wondering if he really was gone for good this time, or if he was waiting for something…

In the end…did it even matter? Sesshomaru would be back. It could be tomorrow, next week; it could be when Rin was an old woman for all she knew. But Sesshomaru never let go of something that he wanted. Not completely anyway. And if he wanted her…then he would stop at nothing to get her.

Shivers traveled Rin's spine until she felt the comforting hand of Kohaku on her shoulder. She had forgotten he was even there.

Rin gave him an apologetic smile, and Kohaku smiled back, seeming to understand. Rin hadn't told him what was going on, but Kohaku seemed to be fine with it this way. So long as he could be there for Rin when she needed him.

Rin returned her gaze to where it had been before, off on some tree in the distance. Nothing was interesting about this tree; it was just easy to look at as her mind wandered again and again…

Suddenly, Rin's eyes snapped to the left, where she saw a flash of silver. Rin sighed as she saw that it was nothing but a pigeon. But, was that a sigh of relief or frustration…?

Ungh…I don't even know what I want anymore…

For the most part, Rin was enjoying the time that Sesshomaru was gone. But on the other hand…she was living in constant fear that he would appear at any moment and steal her away. Maybe if she would stop looking for him around every corner, things would be better.

Without warning, Rin's body stiffened up. Kohaku looked at her with a concerned expression on his face. He was about to say something when Rin sprang from her seat and darted towards her apartment. She shouted back something of a 'sorry' to Kohaku, but she never stopped running.

When Rin arrived in her home, she slammed the door shut and slid down to the floor. She held her head in her hands and shook slightly.

Again, she had seen his face out there…only to find that it had disappeared if she blinked, or looked away for only a moment…

She couldn't do this. She couldn't live with images flashing across her vision and making her crazy. She had to do something about this…even if it meant facing him again…

* * *

Rin wasn't sure where she was going. Someplace she thought that Sesshomaru might appear. But where was that, exactly? Somewhere isolated, where few humans would manage to find if they went poking around. But the one thing Rin knew for sure about Sesshomaru is that he never staying in one place too long. She'd have to catch him in the moment, because he was always on the move.

Really, Rin was doubtful that this would even work. She had no idea where to look. She was just wandering about the few blocks that surrounded her apartment. Sesshomaru might show up…might. But it was unlikely, and why would he be around her home anyway? She had made it quite clear that she didn't want to see him again. So why should he-

Rin stopped dead in her tracks. There he was, in all of his silver beauty. He wore a dark suit, the outer jacket unbuttoned to reveal the white shirt underneath. He had on a blue tie, which seemed unusual…but it brought out the gold in his eyes.

No one seemed able to see him but her. No one was staring at his beautiful face or hurrying to step out of his way like people regularly did. They all just seemed to ignore him. But it could be just another one of Rin's stupid hallucinations…

Rin blinked once, twice, three times. Still, he was there every time she opened her deep brown eyes. His head was tilted up and to the side, and he was standing in a way that made him seem taller, more threatening.

As Rin was still trying to decide if he was only an imagination, Sesshomaru raised his hand and beckoned Rin forward with a finger. Swallowing the lump in her throat, Rin stepped forward.

Sesshomaru turned around to lead Rin through the crowd of people. He never once turned to see if she was following, he just knew that she was. What other choice did she have? He obviously knew that she had been looking for him, why else would she have circled the block numerous times? He had probably been there all along, just waiting for her to decide to seek him out. It seemed like something that he would do…

As Rin slowed her pace, so did Sesshomaru, though he still didn't turn around. She could still turn around…she didn't have to follow him. Or was it too late?

No. Rin had already made up her mind about this, even if it had been a spontaneous decision. She could do this. She _would_ do this. No matter the consequences.


End file.
